Happiness Killer #1

“When you allow yourself to be human you make room for the divine.”

Jill Cruz

Have you ever had the experience where you are feeling really good and suddenly a negative thought intrudes and spoils your fun?

This is a pretty common experience.

For example, you may be feeling very positive about a great workout and basking in the endorphins and a good feeling of accomplishment. Then seemingly out of the blue comes that negative mind with mean words. It could be something like, “Yeah but look how fat my stomach is”.

And then all those good feelings are gone.

Why do we so often rain on our own parades?

Happiness killer

This phenomenon is described very well by Gay Hendricks and he calls it the Upper Limit problem. (link)

Briefly, this is described as where we sabotage our own good fortune or feelings because deep down we don’t feel that we deserve it or we are afraid of being successful or of failing.

But what I would like to suggest is that hidden in this self-sabotage is opportunity.

Because I have found that when you really accept yourself, no matter what, you are opening yourself up for greatness.

To err is human.

Dancing along the line between acceptance and thriving for more is where greatness lies.

Let me give you an example.

This morning I was feeling nervous excitement about a meeting. And in my endeavor to be present as much as possible and to feel appreciation as much as I can, I suddenly thought, “Wow, I get to feel this”.

I felt a deep appreciation for the opportunity to be alive and to feel emotions.

But right after that, my next thought was “Oh yeah, as soon as I get happy I’ll probably die a sudden death”.

And what happened next surprised me.

Yes, I felt some sadness and fear about that thought. I noticed that I was criticizing myself for not being able to maintain that state of appreciation.

But I also realized that I’m not perfect. I’m only human.

And in that space was a feeling of peace.

The moment I accepted myself exactly as I am, even accepting I am fickle with my emotions, even feeling afraid of some imaginary catastrophic scenario, I was able to get back to being present.

And it is my contention that when we can really be present with our thoughts and feelings and really, truly accept what is and who we are in that moment we open ourselves up to the divine.

When we surrender and just allow ourselves to be who we are, we are dancing that fine, beautiful subtle line between striving and thriving. And that is where the magic lies.

I invite you to dance in that space as often as you can.

“I’m happy. Wait, no I’m not. I’m bored. Why am I always bored? What’s wrong with me? Ah….I’m here right now just feeling these emotions and just thinking these thoughts. Wow…I’m right in that magical space between being human and tapping into my divine essence. And maybe that is what life is all about.”

How can we bring this wisdom into our daily habits around our health?

On one hand, I want to be healthy. On the other, I want to eat a bunch of ice cream….

Let me dance in that space for a moment and just allow myself to be feeling both things.

And in doing so, I open up the opportunity for a third option.

I invite you to do the same.

See what happens.

If you’re serious about improving your health and improving your relationship with your body but you’re not sure where to start, I recommend getting on a free clarity call with me. Click the link below.

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